Somewhere around 11 years old, I went to my first counselling session to dig into some anxieties I had been experiencing. Honestly, I completely forgot that I had gone. My mom actually reminded me a few weeks ago and then it all came flooding back--my first experience with a notion I’ve dreaded for years, mindfulness.
In fairness to me, at 11 years old, I wasn’t all that jazzed about some rando telling me how I should live my life. Nowadays there’s a bit more to it than what I had been told in that session. Today, it’s about finding and harnessing your purpose, being present, acknowledging the experiences you’ve had and the emotions that arise along with them...blah blah...you get it. Anyways, 11 year old me came out of that counsellor’s room utterly underwhelmed. Being the little “enlightened” turd I was, I told my mom that it was a complete waste of time. I’ll take it from here, thanks. I got really into music and horse riding shortly thereafter. Those became my greatest sources of subconscious therapy and mindfulness practice.
See, you can’t ride a horse and be distracted. The moment you lose that focus, you and the horse are at risk. Same thing goes for creativity (music in my case). If you aren’t 100% present in your creative environment you put your creativity at risk. Moral of the story, I’ve always been a wise ass and if you are too, consider taking up activities that silently challenge you. Starting with things that throw you into these practices "subconsciously" is great...you don't have to acknowledge the shit that's actually causing your problems...yet. Find things that make you happy, make you feel grounded, secure, and at peace. But also, if you're reading this thinking: "STFU, Delyn.", that's also cool. YOU DO YOU.
Here's a picture of my dog:
